Looking for Meaning

After 26 years in Real Estate sales, I’ve come to understand that people are not really looking for houses, they’re looking for meaning. They are not really trying to find a shelter made of boards and plaster with a roof (for most of us already have that basic need met), they are trying to make a decision motivated by some vision or feeling for their future lives. All of the schematic details of construction and financing don’t have as much impact as tapping into this basic truth…what will this mean to them?

When considering a purchase, our client may not even realize their own thought processes that run the show. In most cases, beneath strategic and thinking mind, there is a deeper yearning, yet to be expressed for the house with a porch swing, the swath of wooded land, and the dining room large enough for their table. The “wish” list just scratches the surface of their heart’s desires.

As a new agent, I would often be making careful notes of features on the wish list, thinking that it would be the key to finding the right match. I’d hear other agents say “buyers are liars” in reference to buyers who would pick a house that had little to do with what they “said” they wanted.  Over time, and especially when I started to study NLP, I was able to get deeper into their internal world  and build a closer relationship which inevitably resulted in trust. I started asking questions like…”what will a porch swing mean to you?”.

I began to use specific words and questions to understand their values, criteria, and how they envisioned their lifestyle and future. And that’s what this blog is about…how to create more rapport with clients, use language as a bridge to dreams, and help others  begin a new journey. As you follow this blog, you may learn more about NLP, observe some of my aha moments, and find your own meaning in this job we call sales.